If you’ve spent most of your life around other men, you may not know where to start when it comes to women. You’ve come to the right place, because I have some suggestions that will help you understand women!

If you have some platonic female friends that you can hang around with, this is an excellent way to start getting to understand women. It will also increase your confidence at dealing with women; confidence comes from experience. Just do this in ordinary everyday situations, such as a shopping trip. Don’t do it in dating settings if you’re trying to understand women.

The next thing to look at are women’s magazines. If you haven’t got ready access to any, going to a shop any buying some is easy enough! Have a quick look through them, and choose some that seem to be aimed at your type of woman. If the very thought of this leaves you terrified, just remember that people care most about themselves, and if they should happen to see you looking through a woman’s magazine, they really don’t care. It’s also not at all unusual. I admit to having flicked through more women’s magazines than men’s magazines in my time, simply because they often do have content that’s worth reading far more than a lot of men’s magazines. I’ve seen men reading women’s magazines in doctor’s waiting areas and the like, and I have done this myself.

First note: unlike the advice afforded by many publications, you don’t have to comment that you’re buying it for your sister or girlfriend. Do so if it helps, but if you do this, you’ll likely come across as unnatural, and that very act is likely to raise eyebrows. Even if it does, as long as you don’t know the shop assistant, that’s fine! Whenever I’m buying any feminine item, magazine, lingerie or whatever, I act as if it’s the most natural thing in the world for me to be doing. (Acting like this is a good confidence trick, by the way.) As with anything else, the only reason you’re scared is that you’ve never done it before.

Just a quick note about women’s magazines. You’ll probably not understand women much from the type of magazine that has a heavy content bias towards celebrity gossip. Whereas a lot of women want to know about celebrities, learning about them yourself won’t do you a great deal of good! My suggestion is therefore to avoid those magazines that go into detail on celebrities’ relationships, weddings, etc.

You may think, why go to the supermarket and spend money? Isn’t all of this supposed to be on the Internet? You’re right! An excellent website for women is iVillage. They have links to other websites for women that are also of interest.

I also recommend that you watch some women’s TV sitcoms such as Sex and the City. You’ll get an insight into what women talk about together, but not usually to men. You may eventually find that when you understand women well enough, they start talking to you about subjects that they would usually reserve for other women, and that will improve your understanding even further!

Don’t forget to post your own hints and tips that you have found useful. Best of luck!

This one’s not just for the women; it’s also for the men, whether single or attached! I’m aiming this article at men. I can speak from experience here which I will relate in this article. For those of you that don’t know, Ann Summers is a shop that targets women as their main customer base. They sell lingerie products and saucy toys and games. The lingerie is to be found at the front of each store, along with mildly saucy items such as handcuffs and sexy board games. Once you go further into the store—in Cardiff UK, past a red curtain extending a short distance along the store—you find hotter items that I cannot talk about here. If you don’t have an Ann Summers store near you, see if you can find something similar, but try not to make it a sex shop that targets men.

Now, as Ann Summers targets women, you will feel apprehensive if you go into the store as a man on your own. I have read that the staff often smell alcohol on the breath of men who go into the store on their own. (Try to avoid the alcohol; it’s better if you don’t need it to go into the store!) I did it on a weekday morning about three weeks before Christmas while my car was being serviced, and there were very few other people in the shop, save for about half a dozen members of staff. The staff (all female) were very friendly, and offered to help me pick out any items if I had any trouble. I probably spent about half an hour looking through the store, and it wasn’t long before the nerves were gone, and I felt reasonably comfortable in the store. I ended up finding a board game I wanted to buy as a Christmas present.

I’m a reasonably confident man, but I’m not about to parade up and down a shopping centre with an Ann Summers shopping bag on display! Neither did I want to have the item I was going to purchase on display; it was raining anyway, so the board game would have been spoilt. I asked them if they did any plain shopping bags, and unfortunately they didn’t. I think they must lose out on a few sales because of this. Anyway, as I wanted to buy some things from other stores, I continued my shopping elsewhere, and finally returned to Ann Summers to buy what I wanted; then I was able to hide the game and the bag in one of the other shopping bags.

The visit was worth doing for three reasons. First of all, the board game I found did manage to raise the temperature when I my girlfriend opened it at Christmas! Secondly, and more importantly, it enhanced my confidence. I visited the shop a second time with my girlfriend after Christmas, and I think I impressed her with my confidence; I did not feel apprehensive at all on this second visit! As you probably know, the sexiest thing a woman can find about a man is his confidence. The third reason was curiosity!

Should you visit the store if you are single? Of course! You can always pretend you have a girlfriend for whom you are shopping if need be, and you don’t have to buy anything. Once you’ve done that, you’ll have no problem walking around any clothing store that sells sexy lingerie. It’s important that you spend enough time in there on your own that your apprehensive feelings become a thing of the past. This has to be worth an hour of your time! And if you already have a partner, I suggest you go in alone first. That way you can get rid of any fears that may be in place when you visit with her. You can either pretend you’ve never been there before, or you can guide her to what she wants to see, or even what you want her to see!

Note that, naturally, you should only visit the store as a couple if you and your partner are open-minded enough to not be offended by any of the items on display. Some coarse language is used within the store; too coarse for me to print here. As long as you’re both happy to proceed, then you will end up enhancing your sex life and your confidence!

If you want to see the sort of things available from the shop before you pay them a visit, follow this link to Ann Summers.

If you’re at a social club or a bar or somewhere else where there are groups of girls out to meet people, which ones should you tend to aim to flirt with, and possibly end up dating? Take a good look at what the girls are doing. If they are just scanning the crowd, not talking to each other very much, this means one of two things. They may be desperate for a date, which may well be a type of girl to go for if you need to build up your confidence, but you may not find there’s much inside; or they may be looking for entertainment, which is likely to be hard work.

It is generally better to try flirting with groups of girls that are spending a good proportion of their time talking to one another, but are also looking around. These are probably interesting girls to meet, and if the group is open enough that you could easily join it, that’s another good sign. If the girls aren’t looking around at all, they aren’t interested in meeting anyone else! Look also for open body language. Folded arms and legs are not good signs; lively, lighthearted conversation is what you’re looking for!

Once you’ve spotted somebody you fancy in an open group, before you put your foot in it, test the water. Start your flirting now, by looking at the girl for about four or five seconds. Look away for a couple of seconds with a small smile on your face, then look back again. If she’s caught your eye and has a slight smile on her face, you’re in with a good chance. The next stage is to walk up to the group, and begin your routine. It may well involve walking somewhere with a purpose in mind, and “accidentally” brushing against her. She will know you’re flirting, which is exactly what you want, and you’ll know whether it’s worth continuing to flirt by whatever she says or does next! You’ll either get a playful smile or something similar, which is a green light to go ahead, or you’ll get an icy stare or something like that, which is a signal to go away.

Don’t worry about getting rejected; remember, you’re the prize, and if she’s not interested then it’s her loss. If she rejected you in a harsh way, would you have wanted her anyway? If you worry too much, then your lack of confidence will be broadcast for all to see by your body language. Also, remember that it doesn’t matter whether you end up dating this girl or not. There are plenty of single, available girls out there! A great way to build your confidence is to keep doing this until you are comfortable doing it!

It’s best to either join the group on your own; you will be displaying a lot of confidence if you do this, which is very attractive; or with one other guy. Don’t travel in packs when you’re flirting; it just doesn’t work. It’s far too off-putting.

Once you’ve joined the group, don’t ignore the rest of the people there; that would be rude. However, do concentrate most of your attention on the girl you fancy. Otherwise she will not get the idea that you are interested in her, or she may think you’ve gone off her!

If things continue to go well, you’ll want to find some reason to touch her! I’m not talking about a handshake or a peck on the cheek, either. If she is close to your personal space, then she’s looking to be touched, actually. Perhaps hold her arm lightly while you point something out to her. Touch does make a great deal of difference, and it should be high on the list in your flirting repertoire! As she and you get more comfortable with touching each other, you can then start to be more daring with your flirting! Who knows, maybe you’ll get as far as a first kiss, or even further, tonight!